I like whips. I like handcuffs. I like the feeling of being in charge. But, I also enjoy it when he tells me what to do. I’m always excited to try new sex toys or positions. I know it might surprise some, but when I started being adventurous in the bedroom and the living room and the shower, I noticed my confidence start to increase when I walked out of the bedroom into business meetings and grocery stores. Sex made my life BETTER. Sex made me MORE COURAGEOUS. Okay, so I thought it was just me (because I like sex), so I asked a few of my friends about it. My friends already know I’ll ask them anything under the sun, so they weren’t surprised when I threw out this one:

“Any of ya’ll feel super confident after sex?”  

They looked at me and started laughing. They weren’t laughing at my question, but at the thought that I had to ask the question.

All of them, every last one of them, with laughter, said…”Hell YEAH!”.

So, I’m not alone when I say that sex builds your courage and confidence. I believe it with all of my heart.

So, I’m saying “F*** the rules and do it more.

Here are 10 ways to build your sexual confidence.

Embrace the goddess within and write out what she likes sexually.

  1. Learn to engage in sexual acts when you actually want to. Say NO if don’t want to do whatever you’re being asked to do.
  2. Explore fresh, new sexual adventures using sex toys, masturbation toys, and accessories without shame.
  3. Tell your partner what feels good or doesn’t every single time.
  4. Love and trust your body. If your body doesn’t react to someone, don’t force it.
  5. Be proud of how you approach your sexual identity whether it’s monogamy, polyamory, or asexuality.
  6. Use your erotic energy to communicate. Yep, flirt, lick your lips, and show your sensuality.
  7. Embrace the sexual preferences of others without judgment.
  8. Allow yourself to shift in your own sexual preferences and desires.
  9. Explore your body without others around. Get to know yourself better <wink wink>.

Bonus: Here are 5 things that happen once you embrace your sexuality.

  1. You walk with confidence.
  2. You say NO with strength.
  3. You love without regret.
  4. You stand tall.
  5. You judge others less.



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