If you’ve been on the Innanet or Facebook for any amount of time you know that The 5 Love Languages is a big deal. Everyone is asking if you know your spouse’s or partner’s love language, and we know for sure that sex ain’t the only love language. Sex is not a love language in the five they mention, but physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, and gift giving.
Gary Chapman, the author and speaker behind the well-known concept, wrote The 5 Love Languages in 1992. He’s sold over 47,000 copies of the book, and he’s added an additional version called The 5 Love Languages for Children. This information and self-help book is focused on understanding how your, your spouse, partner, or friend accepts love. Everyone doesn’t love in the same language, and we should work to share love in a way that our loved ones can accept it and keep it. Loving a person in YOUR love language instead of THEIR love language can truly hinder how you interact with each other.
The love languages are important because they help us understand what others view as loving actions and behaviors. When we love others the way they need to be loved, life is good and sex is GREAT. How we love others is often a reflection of our own desires to be loved. For example, if you are willing to suck the stress from your guy when you give him oral sex, it’s usually because you desire to be loved in the same way…where someone would sex you up to the point of releasing your stress. Here’s the problem though…your guy may love the part where you suck his stress away, but you may not love that extra touching and feeling after a long day of work.
This is why love languages are so important.
Let’s use Shani & Tony (okay…it’s bae and me…LOL).
Shani’s love language is Acts of Service. This means she feels most loved when Tony is putting gas in her car, having dinner delivered, and paying for her pedicure. This also means that Shani might enjoy receiving gifts, but she doesn’t love it as much as she loves when Tony does everything for her around the house, and she can sit and watch television (or sex him up). When Tony does all of these things, Shani is really ready to ride that thang.
Now, let’s look at Tony.
Tony’s love language is Words of Affirmation. He feels most loved when Shani is telling him how amazing he is and how fine he looks. He also likes it when Shani praises him for being a great provider and giving her great sex. Tony loves sex A LOT, but he is more attracted to Shani when she’s blowing his head up with kind words and compliments. When Shani does all of these things, Tony is really ready to lick all of Shani’s love parts.
This is the lesson: Tony & Shani both love sex and gifts, but their love languages are Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation. At the end of the day, their sex life is HOTTER when they love each other based on their love languages because HOT sex is the result of being loved in the language they both enjoy.
Do you know your love language?
Here are some ideas to use for each of the Love Languages……
Physical Touch. What better way to love up on someone than with a sexy massage? Kick it up a notch with this Vibrating Finger toy and watch them exhale in bliss.
Words of Affirmation. If it’s hard for you to always remember to give your partner compliments try writing them down. Make a secret compliment jar and when you think of something to say that will make their heart swoon, write it down before you forget, and add it to the jar.
Quality Time. They just want to be bunned up!! lol Playing a couple’s game is a great way to get in that extra time and probably spice up your foreplay too! While playing 1000 Sex Games you’ll have fun and learn some new things about your partner.
Acts of Service. What are some of the things that your partner does on a regular basis? Make coffee in the morning? You could get up a little earlier and start it so it’s ready. It can be just doing little things to make their life a little easier.
Gifts. This is an easy one. Get them something from Hartsdesires.com!!
Be sure to comment if you need any suggestions or help brainstorming so that your boo knows for sure that you love them!!!